Flashback : Quality concepts demystified

There was once a Zen master called Chow Yun Mein . He was not a Zen master for some old reason like wanting to learn the eternal answer to the puzzle of life. He wanted instead, to pass his time pleasantly without doing much.
So he developed one of those ever popular Zen master beards and wove around an old Chinese folktale replete with love, sex and violence, a hundred and fifty five pithy Confucian lines of wisdom.
He soon came to be known far and wide as Thriiponfoerrapa [ an old Chinese action word which meant 'one who is getting there' ] of the house of Opphyunihie[which was his native fishing village] ...All this fame meant that he was able to spend more and more time doing less and lesser. This he warmed up to as if it were his pet loin...er lion. [ the story of Thriiponfoerrapa and his pet lion is soon to be released in the form of a hentai action clip called Animalaterusk ].
So as he warmed up to his life and his lion in the vermilion shades of his borrowed pagoda, he grew.
He grew and grew and he grew some more. But as time passed he grew aware that his disciples and his beneficiaries were beginning to notice his loathing for his own principles of love and efficiency. He had to do something fast. He had to think of something brilliant to draw them away form their suspicions.
Yes! He had it! He would have to pretend that he was on his way to an even greater understanding of Life, The Universe and Obesity. So he very conveniently had a couple of visions in the presence of a few disciples and more importantly learnt to twitch his beard from right to left when he had these visions.
The disciple beneficiaries were very suitably impressed and pressed him to reveal the secrets he now possesed. They feted him with the best food and wine and even bestowed on him a more learned and formidable name ..Thriiponfoerrapamilla [ an old Chinese action word which meant 'one who is getting there much much faster, we even think he might be there already' ] On another note old chinese died out precisely due to the fact that it was absolutely illogical, unlike this lovely analysis.
So the new improved Thriiponfoerrapamilla of Opphyunihie spent time postponing the announcement of his new found savoir faire. As a desperate attempt he told his disciples that he would reveal the secrets on his death bed.So he ate and he ate and his old mother came to visit him. One day his old mother decided that her little Chow Chow needed some frugal and healthy home cooked food. So she made him rice gruel and seaweed soup.But Thriiponfoerrapamilla's constitution was not what it used to be. The hardy stomach lining which could breakdown the complexities of his mothers' cooking had long since disappeared.
And thus was he finally smote down. The rice gruel and seaweed soup got him and as he lay on his deathbed surrounded by his disciples he cried out aloud to his mother..' am...sick sick,Ma , sick sick,Ma '
His disciples researched his life and his dying words : Six SigMa i.e. Thriiponfoerrapamilla Opphyunihie.

For the Happily ignorant: Six Sigma Quality = 3.4 errors per million opprtunities